Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Rajesh Hamal Jokes

  • Rajesh Hamal inserts his Visiting Card in Any ATM & Collects Cash.
  • Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell RAJESH HAMAL stories.
  • Shahrukh khan was born in Nepal. He wanted to be a SuperStar. Knowing it would be impossible to top Rajesh dai in Kollywood, Sharukh went to Bollywood.
  • Once Rajesh Hamal was having his dinner, right then he became angry with his mom and threw his dinner plate on the air… Now people refer it as FLYING SAUCER or UFO!!
  • Last monday Rajesh Dai updated status in his wall. “Osama bin laden dead :) )” After few minutes, A notification came on his profile. “Osama Bin Laden likes your status” :O
  • God walks on the water… but RAJESH HAMAL swims across the dry land !!!
  • One day Rajnikanth, Spiderman , Superman, Batman,Bruce lee and Chuck Norris visited Rajesh dai’s house … it was an auspicious day of GURU PURNIMA !!!
  • Rajesh Hamal can race with a bullet and win.
  • Rajesh Hamal can divide by zero.
  • Guns don’t kill people. Rajesh Hamal kills people.
  • There is no such thing as global warming. Rajesh Hamal was cold, so he turned the sun up.
  • Rajesh Hamal has counted to infinity. Twice !!!
  • When Rajesh Hamal falls in water, Rajesh Hamal doesn’t get wet. Water gets Rajesh Hamal.
  • When you say “No one’s Perfect”, Rajesh Hamal takes this as a personal insult.
  • Rajesh Hamal doesn’t actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear. (Wish I could do that for my blog posts.)
  • The pen is mightier than the sword, but only if the pen is held by Rajesh Hamal.
  • Rajesh Hamal can retrieve items deleted from Recycle bin after shredding.
  • Rajesh Hamal can delete the Recycle Bin.
  • Rajesh Hamal doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
  • Rajesh Hamal once killed the sea & that sea is now called Dead Sea.
  • Rajesh Hamal can slam a revolving door and he can make it reverse.
  • Rajesh Hamal can make onions cry.
  • Rajesh Hamal doesn’t breathe. Air hides in his lungs for protection.
  • There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq because Rajesh Hamal lives in Katmandu.
  • Rajesh Hamal killed Harry Potter so No Harry Potter’s Eighth book.
  • Rajesh Hamal has already been to Mars, that’s why there are no signs of life there.
  • Rajesh Hamal doesn’t move at the speed of light. Light moves at the speed of Rajesh Hamal.
  • Rajesh Hamal kills two stones with one bird.
  • Rajesh Hamal can easily handle the truth.
  • Chuck Norris once met Rajesh Hamal. The result – He was reduced to a joke on the Internet.
  • Rajesh Hamal’s calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajesh Hamal.
  • Words like awesomeness, brilliance, legendary etc. were added to the dictionary in the year 1964. That was the year Rajesh Hamal was born.
  • Time and tide waits for no one but Rajesh Hamal.
  • Rajesh Hamal can answer a missed call.
  • Once a cobra bit Rajesh Hamal’ leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
  • Ghosts are actually caused by Rajesh Hamal, its because of killing people faster than death can process them.
  • When Rajesh Hamal looks in a mirror it shatters, because the mirror is not stupid enough to get in between the two Rajesh Hamals.
  • Rajesh Hamal got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.
  • When studying, Rajesh Hamal used to practise the english spelling in his copies and collection of those are known as Oxford Dictionary nowadays.
  • Rajesh Hamal does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.
  • The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajesh Hamal kicked one of the corners off.
  • It takes Rajesh Hamal only 10 mins to watch 60 minutes.
  • If you google search “Rajesh Hamal getting kicked” your search will generate 0 results. It just doesn’t happen.
  • Rajesh Hamal’s house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
  • Rajesh Hamal grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
  • Rajesh Hamal once age an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.
  • The only thing that runs faster and longer than Rajesh Hamal are his films.
  • Rajesh Hamal’s every step creates a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of a morning jog.
  • Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajesh Hamal there is no other way.
  • Rajesh Hamal can build a snowman out of rain.
  • Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon. Rajesh Hamal was the first man to walk on the sun.

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